Up close and personal

Some things are better in person. Sex. Hockey. Music.

Others aren't. Dog poop. Fisticuffs. Celine Dion.

But this week I learned that customer service is always better in person.

On two different occasions I discovered that if you stand in front of some jackass rather than trying to get them on the phone they will respond to you.

On Saturday I ordered a pizza and some salad from my local pizza joint. I placed the order at 4:30 and gave them a credit card. At 6 we called and were told that it was on the way. At 6:30 we called again and were told it was on the way. By 7 I was livid and tried repeatedly to call but no one answered the phone. At 7:30 I went to the joint and stood at the counter. I had my pizza, piping hot, within 15 minutes. And they refunded my credit card.

I didn't scream or shout. I just stood there staring at them like a serial killer and it worked.

In case you hadn't guessed my dog has some health issues. On Monday one of her prescriptions was running low so at 8am I called the vet and spoke to the receptionist and asked for a refill. She said to call back in an hour and it should be ready. I called every hour until 4pm. I was patient and didn't raise my voice or get angry. I showed up at the vet's office at 4:15pm. I was out the door with the script at 4:18.

Once again I just stood at the counter staring like a serial killer.

The lesson learned? That Travis Bickle was on to something.

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As of post time I'm listening to Martha from the album "Asylum Years" by Tom Waits